Turn Your Eyes Up
by moonswirl
Summary: Gleekathon, day 1382: Kurt is still adjusting to this world where his counterpart has led a very different and much happier life than he has up to now. - Berry-St series


_Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 64th cycle. Now cycle 66!_

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**"Turn Your Eyes Up"  
In Gen!1 world: Gen2!Kurt, Gen1!Mercedes  
Berry-St series  
_(all series now listed under the communities tab in my profile)_  
**

He knew things were different here, he knew that they knew that he was gay. He just needed to get used to that, and he hadn't made it that far.

This world was so not the one he had been living in all along, and as hard as it was to believe that such a thing as being transported to another world could really happen, he didn't have much to say when he was put up against all of this. He didn't know how to live in this world yet, to be this version of himself who had found it in him to announce himself, to be open, out, to say 'hello, I'm Kurt, I'm gay.' He had to imagine this was someone who could walk with his head held high; his own head was still angled to give him a vantage point of his own shoes.

The world he was part of, unlike this one, had lost its Glee Club and, this much he felt, they had simply lost their glee, their joy. It had been one bad thing after another.

What little exposure he had been given to Glee Club had at least given him one thing, one person, and that was Mercedes Jones. The two of them had quickly butted heads, with rivalling diva aspirations. But once the Glee Club had been lost, Kurt and Mercedes had found a way to put their differences aside and become friends. Soon they would start hanging out at school, and then outside of school. It would only be weeks before they started discussing their 'shows.' They called them that, but really all it came down to was him and her, in his basement, performing to an audience of one camera. These were not filmed with the intention of being uploaded to the internet, where they would become instant stars. This was for them and no one else.

He didn't tell her about his being gay at first. In those days, as much as he knew who he was, not all of him was ready to accept it. He did have one crush, one all-encompassing fixation, and the object of his desires was one Finn Hudson. He was tall, and handsome, really tall, really… He was the star quarterback, one of if not the most popular boys in school, with that smile, and those eyes… Kurt had been taken with him, even so far as to say he admired him. He could never gather up the courage to speak to him or ever imagine that he could feel the same for him, but he was a nice dream to have.

Only as time went on, Finn had changed, his attitude had turned sour, and for Kurt it had been one giant and definitive turn off. Today he could barely remember what he'd ever seen in the guy.

He hadn't been ready to come out. People already messed with him enough when they thought he was some short lanky loser, if he added to it the fact that he was into boys, he might as well have never bothered to show his face at school again, or at least that was what he thought. He couldn't do it.

At least, again, he had Mercedes. She had found out eventually, figured it out. She'd come right out with it and asked him, and by then he knew she was a friend he could trust, so he had been honest. They had become better friends from that day on, and he didn't think he could have made it through some days if it wasn't for her. She had gone so far as to offer herself up to be his fake girlfriend, so they could pretend and he could be a little more at ease. They had been 'dating' ever since, but he knew that wouldn't last forever, it couldn't. Someday she would meet a guy she actually liked and want to be with him… He'd want that too, for himself anyway… if he could ever be open about who he was.

In this world, from the looks of it, he could. And he had been beyond relieved when he had discovered that, in this world, on top of being out and proud and part of a still live and kicking Glee Club, he still had his best friend, still had his Mercedes Jones. He hadn't gotten up the courage to spend time alone with her since he'd been dropped in this strange little world. She was not his Mercedes, if he was honest with himself. She was Mercedes Jones, the same girl, except she had lived a different life, just as the Kurt he was replacing had lived a different life. What if he didn't know how to be around her? If they were as good of friends as they were supposed to be, wouldn't she realize that he was not the same? They had told him not to tell anyone about this whole world jumping thing, and all that meant to him was 'you can have your best friend back, but you have to lie to her.' He could tell her, she would keep their secret, but what if she freaked out, or she didn't believe him? She had been his one life line in his own world, what if he couldn't have her here…

"Why are you ignoring me?" He startled and turned, and there she was, his best friend.

"Mercedes…"

"You know you've been acting real strange these past couple of days, all of you have, you, and Mike, and…" He couldn't do it. He couldn't lie to her.

"Come to my house after school, alright? Then I'll tell you everything. Just don't tell anyone about it, not Rachel, or Santana, or Quinn, or Mike, or Brittany…"

"Don't tell the Glee Club then," she translated, and he paused.

"Yeah."

"If you're trying to pull something for solos…"

"It's nothing like that, just… please come?" He must have looked serious enough, because she'd looked at him, given a nod, and walked on. He watched her go, taking a deep breath. _Keep your head up, Hummel. Enjoy this world while you can._ All he wanted, more than anything in the world, was to still have his best friend.

THE END

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******A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.  
****In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are  
************always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!**


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